Do you feel exhausted and don’t know why? Do you find it hard to get the needed strength to face each day? Do you feel without motivation or desire to do much? My darling, you are having an energetic leak and perhaps, you have not even noticed it.
Often, we commit to more than we can (or want to) do. We fill our agendas with social commitments, events to go to, projects and trips, and chores that, in reality, are not in total synchrony with what we want.
We fear letting down those we love. We strive to show ourselves as good, as a support, as someone unconditional. We leave our needs aside, prioritizing those of others. We ignore the call of our body and believe that we can always push a little more, give a little more, do a little more.
I think it has happened to all of us. Sooner or later we explode. We simply cannot do more. And that is when we want to send everything to hell. When we want to isolate ourselves. When we are intolerant and reactive. That is when we have reached our peak. Or, at least, it seems. Do we stop? No, sir. We continue. Because guilt eats us up, because we believe that others need us. Because we think that we have something to prove.
We live in a society where being constantly busy is rewarded. Where we have to tell white lies to disguise truths in order not to hurt susceptibilities. Where when they ask us “how are you?”, we respond with an automatic “good”, while grinding our teeth.
When did we leave ourselves aside? When did meeting the needs of others become so important? How did we stop taking care of ourselves, of accompanying ourselves, of pampering ourselves? Where did we leave our intuition behind?
Believe me, I understand you. I’ve been there so many times. I have forgotten myself, more than I like to admit. I have ignored my soul every time that I said “enough.” One more meeting, one more coffee, one more hour, one more project. I can do it. I have to continue. Even though I don’t like it anymore. Even though it no longer brings me joy. Even though it no longer fits with my vision of what a happy life should be.
And doing so, I have spent days, months, years. Wrapped up in relationships that no longer flowed so much. In jobs where I didn’t feel fulfilled. Packed with doing, doing, doing. So much that I forgot to simply be. Of being me. And so my life became a daily effort to keep me afloat, to survive. Without energy. Without will. Without joy.
Today I want to invite you to identify where is that energetic leak that is making you so exhausted, so you can see where life is straining you. I share, with love, what has served me. What has helped me connect with happiness. What has returned me to my center. To my magnetic, free and happy essence.
1. Make an inventory
Yes, just like that. Paper and pencil in hand. Make a list of all the things you do every day. Of the projects in which you are involved. Of the people you share your time with. Of what’s in your house. One by one, I want you to see clearly. Ask yourself if the relationship with that person makes you happy or if that routine that was so important to you still is. In this way, you are gaining perspective and I guarantee that you can easily and quickly identify what you are investing time and energy in that is not giving you anything in return anymore. Once you’ve seen it, it is impossible to unsee it, so, then, it’s your sole responsibility what to do about it.
2. Don’t tell white lies
Really, stop. Stop making excuses. No one needs them. Feel free to set limits. To say no. To make your own decisions. If you don’t want to go out, don’t go out. Don’t lie that you have a headache or blame your period. If you don’t want to receive someone in your house, don’t do it. Do not make up imaginary guests for those dates, just to say that your house is full. You don’t owe anyone anything.
3. Give yourself some space
It can be a whole day or a few hours, but take a time that is sacred for you. A space that is NOT NEGOTIABLE. Use it to pamper yourself, to listen to yourself, to do what you want to do.
Being busier doesn’t make you more valuable. Filling every moment of your day with activities does not make you more productive. Jumping from one place to another does not make you efficient. Stop fooling yourself. Let go of the blame. You have the right to DO NOTHING. You have the right to pause once or twenty times. You have the right to rest. To sleep. To slow down.
5. Connect with joy
Fill your life with things, people and situations that really connect you with joy. We are energy and when we vibrate in love, in peace, in happiness, that is precisely what we attract into our lives. It is what allows us to feel connected to the whole. It is what causes us to honor ourselves, to listen to each other, to expand. Your happiness is within you, so give yourself the gift of awakening it even more.
6. Be clear about your values
This is crucial for me. When you know what your values are and you start living according to them, life becomes more bearable. My most important value is freedom and absolutely everything I do and the way I live my life is consistent with it. When you know your values in depth, you no longer settle for less or accept what is not in perfect alignment with them.
If you have read this far I know that you want to make a radical change in your life. I know you want to feel vital and energized again. I know you want to live more connected with life. I honor and congratulate you for that. And you know what? I firmly believe that you can achieve it. Choose yourself. Put yourself first. When you connect with your strength and with your true essence, you understand that if you are well, your world is too.